I'm so frustrated with my addiction to the internet. I want to focus on school, having a social life, SLEEPING, and doing other much more productive things. But whenever I get scared or uncertain, I fall back into mindlessly surfing the internet. I'm really disgusted at myself for that and I wish I could stop it but I've been highly unsuccessful so far. Stupid addiction :(
Also, I wish I could tell my family about my internet family but...that wouldn't turn out well at all. My parents are way too biased and think that everyone online is a rapist/has bad intentions. I have so many good memories with my internet family (or group or whatever) and so many stories that I want to share with my mom but I can't. I'd like to meet some of them too or mail them stuff but I would never be able to without my parent's approval. I wouldn't meet every random person on the internet of course, just those that I have known for 2+ years and highly trust. I'd like to tell my mom of my friend in Columbia who has helped me so much with my spanish work. I'd like to tell her about my friend from Canada who's like my eccentric big sister who's really talented at art and doing fake bird calls. I'd like to tell her about my friend in Texas who I talk to about most my problems that I don't feel comfortable talking about to real life friends (and she's a great person to fangirl to too). I'd like to tell her about my friend from Michigan who I flail to about IB stuff and my other friend who goes to Yale who likes to troll but is generally nice to me. But sadly, I can't tell her about this or else the first thing she'd do is freak out and then probably try to cut me off. But really without these friends I wouldn't be the semi-stable person I am today and I wish she could get past her bias and understand how much of a good influence they are to me.
I also think my family is biased against homosexuality, blacks, and other things and that also frustrates me. When I bring up that I am friends with a lesbian couple, they begin to lecture me on how unnatural it is. They also are like "why the hell do you want to join your school's gay-lesbian-bi-transexual club?! You aren't any of the following are you? You shouldn't hang out with those types of groups!" It's also frustrating because I'm bisexual but I'll never tell them until I'm far away from home. They aren't super biased, but biased to the point that it's kinda annoying when I give them a reasonable point and then they are like "whatever my opinion is my opinion and that is final" without even an explanation on why they believe in that belief. I guess since it's been ingrained so long. But still, annoying/frustrating.
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Also, I wish I could tell my family about my internet family but...that wouldn't turn out well at all. My parents are way too biased and think that everyone online is a rapist/has bad intentions. I have so many good memories with my internet family (or group or whatever) and so many stories that I want to share with my mom but I can't. I'd like to meet some of them too or mail them stuff but I would never be able to without my parent's approval. I wouldn't meet every random person on the internet of course, just those that I have known for 2+ years and highly trust. I'd like to tell my mom of my friend in Columbia who has helped me so much with my spanish work. I'd like to tell her about my friend from Canada who's like my eccentric big sister who's really talented at art and doing fake bird calls. I'd like to tell her about my friend in Texas who I talk to about most my problems that I don't feel comfortable talking about to real life friends (and she's a great person to fangirl to too). I'd like to tell her about my friend from Michigan who I flail to about IB stuff and my other friend who goes to Yale who likes to troll but is generally nice to me. But sadly, I can't tell her about this or else the first thing she'd do is freak out and then probably try to cut me off. But really without these friends I wouldn't be the semi-stable person I am today and I wish she could get past her bias and understand how much of a good influence they are to me.
I also think my family is biased against homosexuality, blacks, and other things and that also frustrates me. When I bring up that I am friends with a lesbian couple, they begin to lecture me on how unnatural it is. They also are like "why the hell do you want to join your school's gay-lesbian-bi-transexual club?! You aren't any of the following are you? You shouldn't hang out with those types of groups!" It's also frustrating because I'm bisexual but I'll never tell them until I'm far away from home. They aren't super biased, but biased to the point that it's kinda annoying when I give them a reasonable point and then they are like "whatever my opinion is my opinion and that is final" without even an explanation on why they believe in that belief. I guess since it's been ingrained so long. But still, annoying/frustrating.
/end rant :D